Some answers on Himmah

For hamba Allah..
but if anyone else is interested in reading..then hey..whats wrong in sharing knowledge rite??

As you asked earlier on, and as explained by bro Ammar Rafeeq, The highest thing that one can target is meeting Allah. I just want to add some bits..consider it an appetizer.

To strive for a cause  is the only reason why we live, yet if we aim to achieve a certain limited success such as straight A's in SPM, or 1st Class Honours Degree, or a professional engineer, then be acknowledged that there will always be a higher cause.
So..
IF we strive for this WORLD, then when we die, there's always the hereafter..
IF we strive for JANNAH, then we achieve it, there's always a higher place..
EVEN IF we strive for the highest place in JANNAH, then there's still the chance of meeting Allah..

BUT if we struggle for the sake of wanting to meet ALLAH, then when we do achieve it, surely we would ask of no more!!

And in living as a person who dreams of meeting Allah, would you think one would do things that Allah dislikes..
He would see sins like fearing enormous mountains..bcoz he knows Allah hates them
His would make prayers in every chance he has..bcoz he knows Allah listens to them
He would repent more than he breaths..bcoz he knows Allah forgives
He would praise Allah each time he speaks..bcoz he knows Allah let him praise
He would deeply love Allah more than anything else..bcoz he knows Allah loves him too..

Ya Allah for with what I say,

I pray show me the way

And Yet He Knows..

I was blogwalking..no i prefer calling blogrunning, bcoz if i'm in a real hurry, i would simply glance at the posts, and make a brief scan..And so i came across this blog and though i didn't pay much attention to the post (really sorry,kinda in a hurry) but somehow what triggered my heart was the background song.
Come..please hear..and feel..

So today...now..here...this second...are you believing that He knows..Think about it...
Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

Love 01

IF UR READING THIS...DO NOT CLICK THE RED 'X'..

Oh.come on..I know that by the time you saw this title you'd already be thinking that this post would be all about the 'so called' boring things like loving Allah..loving the Prophet PBUH..or loving our friends lillahita'ala..

SO IF U ARE..then STOP.

Because shockingly..today Abdur Rahiim Khamaruzaman will be talking about the thing that he reproaches the most.

L. O. V. E...

I really think explanation would be unnescessary, but just in case you still think im talking about the wrong love..

I am talkin about the feeling you have seeing ur bf or gf or future fiancee or future husband/wife...or whatever other things you call it..

I am talkin about the admiration filling ur heart as you glance at the most handsome guy or fairest lady in college..

And YES i am talkin about how our hearts melt as we see the kindness, sweetness and softness of the pearl of our eyes..get it?

This IS ABOUT LOVE

And I really mean LOVE...literally..

huh..even saying the word makes me tremble..

So what triggered this obnoxious post?

Yesterday, and today..yup, its been two days that mom has asked me..
And it sounds something like this;

" If ever one day, you really fall in love with someone, and you start thinking about marriage, what will you do. "

Then I would laugh out..questioning whether it was a joke.

She then said; "No, i'm discussing this seriously."

So i replied with my all noble face:

"Mama, you now that i was just joking about syifa', 'aisyah and even fatimah (all not real names)..sincerely, i know how to control myself."

Well, lately this year, i have been showing her some girls, giving her some names to add in 'the list' and truthfully i had always considered it a joke.you know, just a son-and-mom joke..and she would always say.."there he goes again"..
Back to the story..

Then she would say;

"My dear son, you WILL one day suddenly see your true love, and all that you would be thinking about at that time would be..marriage..then what will you do.."

And there i was dumbstruck, not only in knowing that she was seriously serious..but also that this has never occurred yet, and she convinced me that it will

" I donno..what can i do?"

And then it came out..

" If it does not bother you, i plead..please dear son, when you meet her, and your heart knows that insyaAllah you will be together..please keep her away for the moment..please wait..when the time really comes.."

Now, i know there will be many misunderstandings from this story..things like..
what do you mean by when the time comes?
why the heck am i telling u this story for?
whats the problem with ur mom?
and also..
like whats the problem with YOU?


Man..to solve it all, i'll be needing to tell a loooong story.
And you know how irritating long posts can get..and it is even more suffering for the one writing it..
so i'll stop here..let the questions float for a few days..and if u really think i should continue ASAP, please say so..
P/S: The post is called Love 01..

Ya Allah, for my heart is only for You

guide me to Your love

Ok..ok..its been long enough..

Bismillah..By the name of Allah, The Ruler of all rulers.
I know that i needed to rest for a while, but who knew 'a while' last so long!
So for a change, i decided that its better to start again than wait..
And talking about changes..i'm gonna discuss a thing..i hope would most beneficial to all..especially me..

Have you ever had the feeling that its about time you changed, that you're fed up of the disgracing person you've become, that you know the truth that lies ahead....yet its so hard to change..so tough to endure that path.
You know, that its the ONLY way accepted, and that no other ways are truer than it...but
your past..
your lust..
your wants..
your world..
All seem to cloud the light that you now see.And everytime you jump..the light is back in sight..but then by time, you fall hopelessly back down..so frustrated that it was so near..

This light, is hidayah from Allah the Most Compassionate..
And the seek for it is Tarbiyyah..or in other words, a process to change..good to bad.

Now i'm sure once in a time you've experienced this routine, coz im sure i had..

And one day i learned, that as the saying goes, "aim for the moon, if you fail you'll fall among the stars."

 In a process to change, we must do the same..

Target for the highest thing you can achieve by this change..

like getting ajr?

No, higher..

the reward of heaven?

NO! Target for the HIGHEST thing you want to achieve, your ever dreams, your only reason to live, your 

 highest hope, what you most plead every day and every night...

err, you actually mean, like seeing Allah? to be with Him?

And is there anything higher than THAT? 

For that is called Himmah al-'Aliyah. Your highest dream. And when you want to change, hold firm to it, for there is nothing more important than it. Your world, your lust, your wants and other needs, all will wilt when you compare it to that. Hold it and honour it, insyaAllah..you will persevere..

 Ya Allah for all that I seek is YouI pray, grant my dreams

Cover it, and Allah will cover you later..

Notice how it has been a trend in the society today, to speak about the bad doings of a certain person.
I mean, out of many ways you could introduce someone to a friend of yours, you would prefer humiliating him, letting out his secrets, his weakness..some could even go on and expose the smallest mistake he ever did..
Yet, this trend is still ridiculously accepted??

What??Just consider it a joke??

I'm really sorry, but Islam has clearly lined out..that out of so many things that you can joke around about..
aib's (weaknesses)..are not one of them.

Abu Barzah al Aslami and al Bara' ibn Azib (may Allah be pleased with them) narrate that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:
"O you people who pay lip service to faith when it has not entered your hearts! Do not gossip about the Muslims and do not expose their faults. Whoever exposes the faults of his Muslim brother, Allah will expose his faults, and if Allah exposes his faults it will be open for everyone to see, even if he hid in the innermost part of his house." (Tirmidhi, Hibban).

Conversely,

The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said:
"Whoever defends the honour of his brother in his absence, Allah will protect his face from the fire on the Day of Resurrection." (Tirmidhi).

Easy? Let's test and see..so those who are reading this...before you tell of a person's weakness..
THINK...one day..WHICH WEAKNESSES OF YOURS WILL ALLAH SHOW??

P/S: Dear friend, i'm living proof that this really happens..


Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

A night to think about

Last night was a really long night.
I read something about thinking..

it wasn't actually about the general brain juicing activity, but more to the meaning of contemplating, analysing type of think.
And it really did get me thinking.
I thought about life, i thought about death
I thought about my sins and my deeds
I thought about which was better, and which was more..
Then i thought about
what i've done, and what i'll be doing..
what i've said and what i'll be saying..
what i've seen and what i want to see..
and finally i asked myself,
what have i achieved in life??
and what really do i want to achieve..

And Alhamdulillah, a few things were straightened out...
You really should try it, STOP and THINK..


Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

For I am needing it, and i know you are too...

 

On the authority of Anas (Radhi Allahu Ta'ala Anhu), who said: I heard the Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu alayhi wa Sallam) say:

"Allah the Almighty said: O son of Adam, so long as you call upon Me and ask of Me, I shall forgive you for what you have done, and I shall not mind. O son of Adam, were your sins to reach the clouds of the sky and were you then to ask forgiveness of Me, I would forgive you. O son of Adam, were you to come to Me with sins nearly as great as the earth and were you then to face Me, ascribing no partner to Me, I would bring you forgiveness nearly as great at it."
[at-Tirmidhi, Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal]

Ya Allah today as I plead, I regret the person I've become,

Ya Allah today as I ask, I hope to be the person I once was,

Ya Allah today as I cry, I just wish to come back to You..

Alhamdulillah, Allah has tested me..
Today i lost my phone and RM800++
My first reactions were quite the not me..i felt frustrated, angry, and even started blaming others..
but then i called my mom..and it all turned out better...
She said;
"How can you expect that all turns out well... when your relationship with Allah isn't that well."
And then i suddenly realised that i have been missing many amals lately. My nite prayers, my recitings, my nawafils, all neglected. trying to give full effort for my examinations..and each nite i would set the phone alarm, hoping that it would wake me up for tahajjud..whereas each time it does sound, i ignore it.
So tonite i realise, tonite i come back to You Ya Allah..
For the One who sleeps and wakes is only You..
Thank You for this test..for this come back.


Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

What goes around, comes around

Dear oh dear, have you ever thought that what you say, would really turn back to you, and believe or not it would be so meaningful to you at that time that you can't reckon it was you who said it in the first place..
So these words will be shared, in hope that one day, it will come back to me, especially when i'll be craving for it. For it really has.

Bila hati berasa kejauhan, kita tercari2 jln penyelesaian.
Berdoa, bersujud, berharap. Meminta kepadaNya agar cinta dikembalikan.
Namun, segalanya seperti disia-siakn, jiwa yang kosong tetap kekosongan, hati yang merindu terus keresahan, menanti jawapan kepada persoalan yang tak berkesudahan, berakhir dengan kebuntuan, mencari pihak untuk dipersalahkan.
Lalu kekuasaanNya dipersoalkan, janjiNya dipertikaikan.
Mengapa seperti doa tak diterima? Sujud tak bermakna? Harapan tak kedengaran?
Adakah Allah telah melupakan kita?
Sedarlah, sebenarnyayang memiliki keesaan, yang melengkapi kesempurnaan, hanyalah Allah, bukanlah kita , insan yang lemah dan leka.
Apa guna berdoa kepadaNya tanpa menyedari apa yang dipinta.
Apa erti bersujud padahal hati megah berbangga dengan dunia.
Buat apa berharap sedangkan diri sombong dengan kuasa.
Oleh itu, kembalikanlah dirimu walau selangkah kepadaNya, nescaya Dia akan mengembalikan diriNya seribu langkah  ke dalam dirimu.
Itulah caranya mencari keimanan, bagi hamba yang merindu cinta Tuhan.


Forgive me for the language, but it doesn't matter because then again, its about something inside..
Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

Unsubstantial

Life is dull? Boring? A repetition of two or three routines?
So make it  unsubstantial, and you'll see what life really is.



Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.

For You are the Almighty

A form in forgiving about history.

Expectations and unexpectations. Things that we encounter everyday in life. But believe me, it all comes from what we choose, what we desire. Despite the fact that Allah plans it all out for us, it is still always about choosing. I mean you can choose to do, or not-do. You can choose to forgive, or hate. You can choose to live, or die. For goodnes sake, you can even choose Heaven, or Hell.
So when one day. you walk out and suddenly see that you've took the wrong step,
NEVER...i repeat...NEVER blame it on conditions, NEVER blame it on someone else. They may have pushed you, shoved you and persuaded you on the path, but it is still YOU who decided to keep walking, never looking back, though knowing that the road was a diversion, you still liked it, because it was full of berries fruiting off the side bushes.
So whatever happened in the past, let it be a history. Though the come-back would be tiring, never give-up, never regret, for you knew it all along, its just that you didn't realise. So stop regretting for the time you've wasted. Stand up, turn around and return to His path. And praise all to Him who has shown you the way.

"We have indeed sent down signs that make things manifest: and Allah guides whom He wills to a way that is straight."

An-Nur 24:46

 Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

Thy Heart

There, there. So they say time changes people. and truly it does. I've somehow become a different me now. But still me. And though people ask, people question, wanting to know why, none understands. For it is the whispers of thy heart, and doth not He who creates the heart know more about thy thoughts and counsels of thy heart. Thus shall thy tell of it to none other than Him.
And truly, He is the Most-Listening.


Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

And You Now See..

Bismillahirrahmaanirrahiim.

Ya Rahmaanu irham dha'fana..

My Lord, My Creator, My Superior, My Persevere,

Please listen to my prayers, for today, i seek You, i need You, i return to You, 

and today, i finally see You, after being blind for so long,

So all i ask Ya Allah, 

please keep me on this road.

In the night I pray, I'm seeking Your way, its just for You.

When I shed a tear, I know You're near, its just for You. 

Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

when you least expect it

Alhamdulillah.Alhamdulilah.Alhamdulillah.
And you ask me why i praise Allah? Because today Allah taught me that there are times when i think some matters would be useless to me, and i cared less for whatever that would occur, but suddenly in the condition where i least expect it, Allah will show the way, Allah answered my prayer and showered me with the light i've been seeking so much. Today i learnt my lesson.
Stop waiting for answers in prayers, in dreams, in prostration,
waiting for a lightning to strike down at you feat,
waiting for the rain to hover above your head,
waiting for a beam to shine on your face,

Just believe in HIM, and put full belief in HIM, for He IS our Creator, The Superior, The Almighty.
And you'll see that it'll come, the answers, in ways you least expect.
Just Believe.
Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

Ya Allah I plead..

something's missing in my heart..something that i once held firm, something that i loved, something that i'm needing so much now..
as he promised, He will always be there

Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

For this Finale

I wanted to share with you a small discovery I made last week: Have you ever noticed that if you spend the first 5 minutes at the beginning of any task on distracting activities then you won't feel like working on the task at hand and being productive? 

 

So let’s say you are about to start working on a big report, but instead you start checking news sites, read a couple of interesting articles, forward them to some friends and tweet about them....before you know it, all your intentions for doing that big report are gone and you don’t feel like doing it anymore.

 

Now here’s the good news: If you inverse the above and ensure that those first 5 minutes are sacred and are spent ONLY on the productive task at hand and nothing else, you’ll continue working on the task for minutes if not hours to come and most probably finish it.

 

Try the above and let me know if it works for you!

 

~tips from ProductiveMuslim

Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

Some motivation needed

There's this thing about the heart. No matter how hard you try to avoid, it'll always fall in love. Believe me, its nature, and no man runs from nature, even me. But there are ways...there are always ways.
keep it up..keep it up...and be strong!!
Ya Allah, give me strength, for it is all Yours.
Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

There...there..

Notice how man can see man as an angel.

• that when one man mistakes, the other condemns, forgetting the fact that what was done may not be the best thing.may even be a thing done out of awareness.a wrongness. As said by the beloved prophet, "Each and every sons(descendants) of Adam shall do wrong. And the best wrongdoer is who repents"
•  that when one man influences, the other blindly follows, hearing to his words as if everything was right. forgetting the fact that deep inside each man is a dark creature, burnt thrice before bowing to The Creator. 

But then,
Notice how man can see man as a devil.

• that when one man does good, the other condemns, throwing rediculous accusations towards his sincerity, building up teams of hatred to reflect every action he does.
•  that when one man influences, the other blindly ignores, forever stuffing the cold shoulder into his face, neglecting everything, not even a single word.closing all functionable receivers,even the heart. "Say, [O Muhammad], "I do not tell you that I have the depositories [containing the provision] of Allah or that I know the unseen, nor do I tell you that I am an angel. I only follow what is revealed to me." Say, "Is the blind equivalent to the seeing? Then will you not give thought?"(Al-Anaam : 50)

So??
So stop seeing men as angels, stop seeing men as devils. Se a man as a man.
And see what he does, hear what he speaks, understand what he delivers, as a man. Forget who he is, where he's been, what he does, and how he speaks.
And with that you'll  see, if it is what Allah wants, what Rasulullah admits, its true.
But if it is what Allah forbade, what Rasulullah warns, its just a tale told by an idiot full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.



Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

Must let it OUT

Ok..I've been keepin this for days...So read carefully.

What makes YOU different from OTHERS??
By saying that you don't go out ALONE together, you don't TOUCH each other, that you're so called ISLAMIC..you THINK what you're doing is RIGHT??
My brother, my sister, so long as you're not married...NEVER claim as if you ARE
A SIN IS A SIN!!

REMEMBER....
You ONCE said, this would never happen...that YOU know it is wrong...so you're just gonna keep this relationship until THE DAY comes..you will never make close relationship, you will never go out, you will never make late night calls!!
BUT WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING NOW!!
Look at yourself..OPEN YOUR EYES MAN!!

Astaghfirullahal Azim..Ya Allah, I may have gone over the border...but let this small effort be a reminder to those that have forgotten..ESPECIALLY FOR ME..may it be reread everytime i fall.

Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

Ignorance by time

What happened yesterday was living proof that principles and belief can simply be crushed by sweet words and nafsu. Couldn't believe that it was that easy for someone to change..
Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

Through every tunnel, there will always be an end, Through every darkness, there will always be light,Through every sin, there will always be forgiveness,All it needs is a little belief, Have faith in Allah my friend and you'll see it..

Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.
For You are the Almighty

Making Choices

Today there was a talk about making choices. And the Ustaz said..
" When one chooses, he must be ready to reflect the effects of his choice. For every inch in life is about choosing. Even the hereafter is a choice."

So then i began thinking, what would i do if there was a time when i chose wrong??
Regret?
Cry for days?
Hope that time rewind?

Thats the problem with us humans, we keep thinking that a decision is done based on our intellects and knowledge, when in fact, we forget that every choice is actually organised and planned by Allah..
And will Allah ever burden a person with what he is unable to bear??
NEVER!!

" On no soul does Allah Place a burden greater than it can bear. It gets every good that it earns, and it suffers every ill that it earns. "

Al -Baqarah 2:286

So why are things so hard?

" So, verily, with every difficulty, there is relief. Verily, with every difficulty there is relief. "

Al-Insyiraah 94:5-6

And in the next 2 verses Allah tells us that then we have to return to Allah, and give full attention. So things could never turn out that easy for us..Allah WILL test our patience in the choice that we made. Believe it or not, choosing isn't about deciding whats best for us, but its about being strong and firm with the choice, pushing aside all obstacles and persevering with  patience. 

"...And for those who fear Allah, He (ever) prepares a way out. And He provides for him from (sources) he never could imagine. And if any one puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is ((Allah)) for him. For Allah will surely accomplish his purpose: verily, for all things has Allah appointed a due proportion."

At-Talaq 65:2-3

But then, keep in mind that sometimes if Allah wills, there is a chance to change your decision..but i apologise because the conditions and situations are never the same. And only one in the dilemma of a choice could understand.
WHATEVER IT IS..
TURN TO ALLAH, HE'S NEVER FAR AWAY..PUT YOUR TRUST IN HIM, RAISE YOUR HANDS AND PRAY..

Ya Allah.Forgive me for my mistakes.Aid me with what I said.For You are the Almighty

Fighting the Heart

There are times..when one just can't listen to the heart..times when it tells us to do things that we know is wrong.
So how to fight it?
Here's a tip..learn to hate..hate what it likes..if it is a person, then hate him/her..if it is a thing, hate it..if it is a behavior,hate it..
But don't show your hatred..just let your heart and yourself know..and InsyaAllah, by time, it'll work.

Just noticed that strength and consistency are 2 different things..
you could be really strong in heart...believe that you'll never repeat your mistakes..believe that you'll be able to prevent yourselves from every sin...believe that you'll be so strong..
but then still you'll never know whether it'll last..all those confidence, all those beliefs could be suddenly gone..
' poof ' just like that.
so its really consistency that matters..'istiqamah'. because if you have nothing much..but you can keep that much going on and on...insyaAllah..you'll never fall..
so no use of building up bundles of strength if you can't make it flow..istiqamah.insyaAllah.
Ya Allah grant me perseverance..

This Silence

I know...its long..no2, too long..since i posted something. and if u understand this post, you'll somehow understand why.
today im gonna discuss the characteristics of a tide...no i'm no civil engineer..or a man who's interested in collecting renewable source of energy (tidal energy, like the one in France)..but the thing that makes tides and ourselves similar is that it has its ups and downs...its strong and weak..
i mean..sometimes we can be so powerful, that even the hardest obstacle would be like a pebble on the road, if not crushed, easily kicked out of the way..
but then at other times we can be so feeble, that even the slightest problem would make us crumble down and fail..
again..i am not promoting a regular gym routine..because this certain strength matters much more than the physical strength. Its about something inside..
But its okay..alhamdulillah, its now okay..i was just needing a little
time..a lot of effort..and a short silence..
and of course..strength from non other than Him..Alhamdulillah..

Asma Allah

Allahuakbar..some good things to hear in this beautiful month..
Sami Yusuf - Asma Allah

Or just hear it on my blog...
Here are the lyrics..(and translation)..hear and feel..hear and feel..

Raheem, Kareemun, ‘Adheem, ‘Aleemun,

(Merciful, Generous, Incomparably Great, All-Knowing)

Haleem, Hakeemun, Mateen

 (Forbearing, Wise, Firm)

Mannaan, Rahmaanun, Fattaah, Ghaffaarun

(Bestower of blessings, Most Compassionate, Opener, Forgiver)

Tawwaab, Razzaaqun, Shaheed

(Accepter of Repentance, Provider, Witness)

Allahumma salli ‘ala Muhammad, wa aali Muhammad

(O my Lord send salutations upon Muhammad

And upon the Family of Muhammad)

Ya Muslimeen sallou ‘alayh

(O Muslims, send salutations upon him)

Allahumma salli ‘ala Muhammad, wa aali Muhammad

(O my Lord send salutations upon Muhammad

And upon the Family of Muhammad)

Ya Muslimeen sallou ‘alayh

(O Muslims, send salutations upon him)

Lateef, Khabeerun, Samee’, Baseerun

(Gentle, All-Aware, All-Hearing, All-Seeing)

Jaleel, Raqeebun, Mujeeb

(Majestic, Watchful, Responsive)

Ghafur, Shakourun, Wadud, Qayyumun

(Forgiving, Appreciative, Loving, Self-Existing by Whom all subsist)

Ra’uf, Saburun, Majeed

(Most Kind, Patient, Most Glorious)

Allahumma salli ‘ala Muhammad, wa aali Muhammad

(O my Lord send salutations upon Muhammad

And upon the Family of Muhammad)

Ya Muslimeen sallou ‘alayh

(O Muslims, send salutations upon him)

Allahumma salli ‘ala Muhammad, wa aali Muhammad

(O my Lord send salutations upon Muhammad

And upon the Family of Muhammad)

Ya Muslimeen sallou ‘alayh

(O Muslims, send salutations upon him)

Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar,

(God is Great, God is Great)

La Ilaaha Illahu, Al Malikul Quddoos

(There is no god but Him, the King, the Most Holy)

Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar,

(God is Great, God is Great)

Ya Rahmanu irham dha’fana

(O Most Compassionate! Have compassion on our weakness)

Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar,

(God is Great, God is Great)

Ya Ghaffaaru ighfir thunoubana

(O Forgiver! Forgive our sins)

Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar,

(God is Great, God is Great)

Ya Sattaaru ostour ‘ouyoubana

(O Concealer! Conceal our defects)

Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar,

(God is Great, God is Great)

Ya Mu’izzu a’izza ummatana

(O Bestower of honour! Bestow honour on our Ummah)

Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar,

(God is Great, God is Great)

Ya Mujeebu ajib du’aa’ana

(O Responsive One! Answer our prayers)

Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar,

(God is Great, God is Great)

Ya Lateefu oltof binaa (x3)

(O Gentle One! Show gentleness to us)

Oltof binaa

(Show gentleness to us)

Decree what you desire to decree..

Today as i was reading the 16th Juz...(Yeah i know, quite left behind..since today is already the 20th. been too busy with other useless things.) i came across the story of Musa (Moses) and his confrontation with the pharaoh.
In suurah Ta Ha (20)..Allah tells us of the story when Musa met the pharaoh and as the pharaoh claims that Musa is a wizard, he challenges Musa to a match..

Now, I'll skip the story of how they both agreed and what happened on the day.
Because my real point would be what was told in this verse;

65.	They said:"O Mûsa (Moses)! Either you throw first or we be the first to throw?"
66.	[Mûsa (Moses)] said: "Nay, throw you (first)!" Then behold, their ropes and their sticks, by their magic, appeared to him as though they moved fast.
67.	So Mûsa (Moses) conceived fear in himself.
68.	We (Allâh) said: "Fear not! Surely, you will have the upper hand.
69.	"And throw that which is in your right hand! It will swallow up that which they have made. That which they have made is only a magician's trick, and the magician will never be successful, to whatever amount (of skill) he may attain."
70.	So the magicians fell down prostrate. They said: "We believe in the Lord of Hârûn (Aaron) and Mûsa (Moses)."
71.	[Fir'aun (Pharaoh)] said: "Believe you in him [Mûsa (Moses)] before I give you permission? Verily! he is your chief who has taught you magic. So I will surely cut off your hands and feet on opposite sides, and I will surely crucify you on the trunks of date-palms, and you shall surely know which of us [I (Fir'aun Pharaoh) or the Lord of Mûsa (Moses) (Allâh)] can give the severe and more lasting torment."
72.	They said: "We prefer you not over what have come to us, of the clear signs And to Him (Allâh) Who created us. So decree whatever you desire to decree, for you can only decree (regarding) this life of the world.
73.	"Verily! We have believed in our Lord, that He may forgive us our faults, and the magic to which you did compel us. And Allâh is better as regards reward in comparison to your [Fir'aun's (Pharaoh)] reward, and more lasting (as regards punishment in comparison to your punishment)."
74.	Verily! whoever comes to his Lord as a Mujrim (criminal, polytheist, disbeliever in the Oneness of Allâh and His Messengers), then surely, for him is Hell, wherein he will neither die nor live
75.	But whoever comes to Him (Allâh) as a believer (in the Oneness of Allâh), and has done righteous good deeds, for such are the high ranks (in the Hereafter),—
76.	'Adn (Eden) Paradise (everlasting Gardens), under which rivers flow, wherein they will abide forever: such is the reward of those who purify themselves (by abstaining from all kinds of sins and evil deeds which Allâh has forbidden and by doing all that which Allâh has ordained).

Subhanallah, as i came across the 72nd verse, i couldn't hold my tears. These sorcerers, who so denied the existence of Allah the Almighty, could suddenly prostrate and submit their selves to such an extent!!
And as the pharaoh threatened them... what did they say??

"..decree whatever you desire to decree, for you can only decree this life of the world.."

Allahuakbar. Such Belief. And there Allah promises them the beautiful 'Adn. The question is, what made them so strong? A stick that turned to snake? Oh, come on...they've turned ropes into snakes many times..
Think about it.
On the day of the match, everyone saw the stick turn into a snake. Everyone saw it swallow the fakes. But how could these sorcerers believe to such a level??

It was the openness of their hearts.
because you see, only sorcerers know what magic is, and in seeing what Musa did, they realised that no power is capable of allowing such to happen other that the power of Allah!!

How about us, you, i, or whoever lives in this world?? I'm gonna be an engineer, you're gonna be a programmer, or doctor, or teacher, or psychologist, or whatever else..but then in seeing the Greatness of Allah in managing this life, the world, the sky, the sees, and every single activity of even the smallest bacteria to the most complex galaxy..have we ever fell down, prostrating ourselves to THIS utter POWER??
HAVE WE EVER??

Jo hai sama kal ho naa ho..

Afwan

Some questions unanswered...
Some messages unreplied...
Some apologies needed...

afwan,,i'm sorry,,
for time ties men with unbearable responsibilities...
but i shall cope. insyaAllah.

Mightier than the sword

today an event really shook me. and now i know what it really meant by 'mightier than the sword'. i will not elaborate more on the incident, but if you are reading this then please swallow in these following messages carefully..

WATCH WHAT YOU SAY

sometimes words can mean more than mere sounds projecting out of your mouth. when heard, it can be manipulated, changed, and misunderstood. which means misunderstanding. though YOU know that it wasn't really meant that way..but do THE OTHER PEOPLE know? though not all of them would get upset with YOUR words..but at least ONE will..then suddenly..BANG..BOOM..and someone hates you.

Rasulullah PBUH once said:

"The best words are those that are short and precise"

learn to stop. learn to shut up.

remember..people have mouth..and most importantly..they have ears..

(this is a story of experience..so believe me it happened..)

Noor - All For You

My prayers, my breath, my life and my death are all for you
None but you, only you, ya Allah
Every second I live, every penny I give
Is just for you
Every breathe I breath, every trace I leave
Is just for you
In all my fears, in all my tears
I’m callin’ you
In all my shame, in all my pain
I’m callin’ you
Through the night I pray, and I’m seeking your way
And it’s just for you
When I shed a tear, I know you’re near
And it’s just for you
Hayaty wa mawty wa ruhy wa dammi ilayka ya Rabi
Anabtu ilayk laja’tu ilayk, ya Allah

Translation:
My life and my death, my soul and my blood
They’re all for you my Lord
I turn to You, I submit to You, my Lord

La Tahzan

There are some periods in life when you and i will always experience sadness. despair. hopelessness. we think that we could be strong. we think that we would be able to pass everything successfully. we think that we could just be ourselves..but then we were actually wrong. things turn out different. the surroundings change us, the conditions evolve us. so by the end of the day we regret everything we did. crying to ourselves how things have gone out of control. and then we ask ourselves.."what's happened to ME? what am i doing?"..
and then we keep telling ourselves that we mustn't give up..whereas deep in our hearts things are much harder than said...
So what SHOULD we do??
my dear brothers and sisters. la tahzan means don't be sad. because if we believe that everything comes from Allah..then it would really help the acceptance. but what we must really believe is that being who we are means being the person we must be..not because others wan't us to be who we must be..not because we think it appropriate to be who we must be..but because we KNOW that Allah wants us to be who we must be..and that if we achieve His blessings..then it shall be enough..no matter how hard things get...

Get it? Apologies for the jumbled up words..but just try to understand.

Thome Sings to ponder..

Brains gone a bit dizzy...i really should stop this habit of analysing humans and predicting their next move..
One of the things that weaken us is 'Ujub', and 'ujub only comes when you predict and compare others with yourself..

and in the end you come out with..
"im better than her"
or
"im better than him"

Must stop comparing..

Its About Time

In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious, Most Merciful

A few weeks ago, I've been waiting for this time..always eager for it to come. Days I wait for it and I knew that i had to be prepared. But now. Knowing that it would be tomorrow..no...to be exact...this night..i suddenly feel this surge of fear. Fear that i am not prepared. Fear that I am not ready to go through this. 

No, im not scared about having to fast..oh come on..i've been doin it for years..

And definitely im not scared of the Tarawikh prayers..

But what im really fearing is the fact that i will be going through a system..and if i fail to graduate successfully it would be a waste..SUCH A WASTE!!

So to soothe this feeling i called my mom..and her reply was enough for me to understand.She said:

"It doesn't matter whether you're prepared or not..Ramadhans' still gonna come..so if you realise that you're not ready..BE READY as much as you can..because it really is about time you did."

 So from now on..I vow..no more playing around...no more late prayers..no more late night games..

and i'll be struggling for

more Quran..more rawatibs..more qiamullail...more reading..

FOR MY PURSUE IS TAQWA

AND I ASK NOTHING ELSE THAN IT

Ya Allah..aid us, Your weak servants in this sacred month..

this hypocrisy

ok, things are getting a bit hectic this week.
everyday, there would always be a new problem, but i dont mind. its a challenge for me.
have you ever felt that you were born in this world to please others, and make your own self suffer?
well not literally suffer..but you just can't 100% be yourself.
i do. kudos to me..
having to please others is one of the problems i have to face everyday.
ever heard of : "you've changed" or "stop acting" or even "dont need to be friends anymore" ?
if you have, then good. if you havent, then good also.
its just hard to please everyone at the same time. i don't care much if  people hate me for being who i am, but what hurts me the most is the fact that i sometimes lose in this battle of hypocrisy. that i sometimes surrender, questioning the rationals in wearing this 'mask', getting tired of being this actor. but in the end i learned that sometimes i just can't bluntly follow my heart..be who i wanna be..do what i wanna do..
for in Islam, there are rules, there are borders and lines, and if i fail to follow these lines closely, how am i supposed to gather my friends in the border?

friends are not measured on how long you have known them, but on how close you are with them and how much you care for them. not just here, but also in the hereafter.
and i admit that i care a lot for my friends. in fact, i care too much that some even consider me being a busybody. stopping them from falling in love, questioning each and everything they do, accusing them for minor things. but i believe as Rasulullah SAW once said:

"A good friend and a bad friend are like a perfume-seller and a blacksmith: The perfume-seller might give you some perfume as a gift, or you might buy some from him, or at least you might smell its fragrance. As for the blacksmith, he might singe your clothes, and at the very least you will breathe in the fumes of the furnace." 
[Sahih al-Bukhari & Muslim]

so i apologise when things have been weird, or i've gone too much into your lives. i've been trying so hard to be the perfume and when i hold on to a principle, it clings to me like there's no tomorrow, so in the end, people hate me, i loose friend(s), and these are my weaknesses..
so please, as a human who does wrong..advice me in my weakness, where there is a possibility..i'll change..
and maybe you'll be the 'perfume' for me..

P/S: this is not a surrender...for i'll still be who i plan to be. though you call it 'bad' i call it a job..

Just 4 ladies..(19 above only)

Ok. Frankly speaking (writing)..this is being more of a counterpost to the gender-biased post before this. So when I finally decided on the topic.. I actually realised that I'm not that much expert in advising the opposite gender..
So here's what i've to say..
Have you ever been to a shopping mall..ok lets say SOGO..and it was a big sale day. Say that you arrive at the purse department. So there would be discounts..30%..50%..and even 70% off!! Okay..in your mind at that time..which would be more valuable? A purse on discount or the one under the NEW ARRIVALS?
Think about it..if you girls keep selling yourselves..promoting yourselves..with LOW PRICES, and even discounts..believe me..you will be the center of attraction. For a while. But the real demand would be for the new and clean. It would be everyone's dream..and the one's on discounts would be a temporary possession..depending on its attractiveness and up-to-dateness. Maybe a week..maybe two..
So think about it..
Think about your outfit before going out..AM I THAT CHEAP?
Think about your attitude before mingling with others..AM I THAT DESPERATE?
THINK..

My dear sisters, that is why Allah taught us..no I'm sorry..taught you all to watch your eyes and protect your'selves' (an-Nur:31), what you wear (an-Nur:59), how you speak (al-ahzab:32)..not because Allah envies your beauty (for He is al-Jameel), but because he wants you to be honored, to be respected..to be properly loved..


P/S: I'm not quite sure the proper message is clearly conveyed here..but believe me, if you think I'm wrong..then try it out..sell yourself..go 'showoff'..
But then be readily acknowledged that even I would never want you!! Haha..

The heart

Hardening of the Heart 4/5

Dr. Abu Ameenah Bilal Philips
Methods of Cure: (3) the Qur'an
Transcript of a lecture
Darul Arqam, Singapore, 26th November 1998

The third way by which we can soften our hearts is the Quran itself. Allah states in the Quran, Al-Hadid, 57:16, "Has not the time come for those who believe for their hearts to fear Allah when they hear the Quran (dhikrullah here is in reference to the Quran) and what truth there is in it, so that they not be like those who received the Scripture before, but in the passage of time, their hearts became hard. And most of them are corrupt."
If we reflect on the Quran, it has the power to soften our hearts. Allah said, about the jinn who heard the Quran, "Indeed we heard an amazing Quran; it guides us to Allah and we believe in it and we will set not partners besides Allah." [See Quran, Surah al-Ahqaf 46:29-32]
Allah goes on to describe the righteous, "And if they (this is amongst the Christians) hear what was revealed to the Messenger, you will see their eyes welling up with tears because of what they know of the truth of what has been brought." This was the case of the ruler of Ethiopia. When Muslims sought refuge there and they recited a portion of the Quran, they saw his eyes fill with tears.
This is how we should be. When we hear the Quran, we should reflect on the meanings. The Quran should not become for us a replacement for pop songs that we used to hear before. People buy recordings of their favourite reciters for the beauty of their voice… The listening of the Quran has become more of a musical thing. We are entertained by that music, so much so that when the reciter is reading, we hear people in the background going, "Allah! Allah! Allah!" People making statements in the background as thought it were a pop show! This is not the Quran… Allah tells us, "Will they not reflect on the meanings?"
The Quran is a Book of Guidance and it is in the reflection on the meaning of the Quran that we benefit, for it is very important for us to re-assess how we are dealing with the Quran. We should be reading it regularly, not only leaving it until Ramadhan. We reflect on it… not reading it Ramadhan so we can finish the whole Book and say we finished the Quran in Ramadhan. It really does not matter if we don’t finish the Quran in Ramadhan. For most of the Prophet’s Sallallahu ‘Alayhi wa sallam life, he did not finish the whole Quran in Ramadhan. Most of the companions did not finish the reading of the Quran in Ramadhan. Today, for us, Ramadhan is not complete unless we read the whole Quran in Ramadhan. We hire reciters to recite the Quran at 99 miles an hour so much so that even Arabic-speaking people cannot figure out where in the Quran the reciter is!
This has become the precedence — finishing the Quran in Ramadhan and if you can finish it twice, even better! But this is not what the Quran is for. The Quran is for reflection, so that when we hear it, as Allah says of the believers who hear the Quran recited, goose bumps come over their skins. It touches them and causes their heart to tremble.
[Quran Az-Zumar 39:23 : Allah has revealed (from time to time) the most beautiful Message in the form of a Book, consistent with itself, yet repeating (its teaching in various aspects): the skins of those who fear their Lord tremble threat; then their skins and hearts do soften to the remembrance of Allah.] If when we listen to the Quran, we don’t find this reaction of tears coming to our eyes, then we should make ourselves cry. Force ourselves to cry because we need to respond to the Quran in this way. If we don’t, we are lost! This is the Word of Allah, the only preserved Word of all the revelations that were given from Adam till now. This is the word of God preserved.
We should read the Quran believing this is Allah speaking to us, because that is what it is. It is Allah talking to us directly. Every time he tells us something about the Jews, we should not (merely) take it as a piece of information, that the Jews are this and that the Jews are that. No! Whenever Allah tells us something about the Jews, we should see in it as a warning to ourselves — that we don’t become like them. When Allah said, "… ghairil maghdoobi ‘alayhim wa la-ddaalleen…" in Surah Al-Fatiha, the Prophet Sallallahu ‘Alayhi wa sallam explained that al-maghdoob ‘alayhim are the Jews and that ad-daalleen are the Christians. Those with whom Allah is angry are the Jews and those who have gone astray are the Christians. Allah is angry with the Jews because they KNOW the truth and they don’t act on it. "Call people to righteousness and you forget yourselves." They changed the Book. The Christians are without knowledge; they are lost. They think that God is a man!
This is a warning to us. Every time we recite these verses, Allah is warning us not to be like them — we have the truth, we have the Scripture, but we are not acting according to them. If we do not seek knowledge, if we do not find out what it is Allah wants from us, then we are lost. Every time we read the "… ghairil maghdoobi ‘alayhim wa la-ddaalleen…", it should touch us. We should reflect on it and it should touch us.
There are so many verses throughout the Quran which remind us of the Hereafter, that remind us of the signs of the Day of Judgement. It is enough for us to open any part of the Quran to read about them. In virtually every chapter of the Quran Allah addresses the next life. It is linked to our second point of visiting the graves and remembering the Hereafter. The Quran speaks about the life to come and to reflect on it.

So keep reading the Quran..understand it..for it is The Guidance..

Alhamdulillah

Has it ever occurred to you a time that you regret so many things in life, knowing and believing that if only there was another chance, you would ask that it was different, that it wasn't the way it now is..

Has it ever occurred in you an urge to ask for something better, for something more..

Has it ever crossed your mind a feeling of dissatisfaction as you see yourself in the mirror, gazing at your failures, your smashed hopes, your forgotten dreams..

Well, if you think you answered no for each of these questions stated above..then just stop reading, coz what i'm about to say would mean nothing to you.

You see, I'm a human. And I also have been through these conditions. I seriously understand how hopeless it felt...

But one day, as I was so depressed..I began looking for solutions..and this is what i ended up with..

Maybe I am not that clever..but I have a brain..and it could still think..Alhamdulillah..
Maybe I am not strong..but I have a body..hands and feet..and it could still move..Alhamdulillah..
Maybe I am not perfect..but I still could do things others can't..and I am proud of it..Alhamdulillah..


So are there things that I missed? Things that I failed? Of course there are!! 
But there much much more things that I still have. And I can't even say its enough..because He'll still keep giving and I'll still be needing it..

So its just...Alhamdulillah..

Say what you do? Do what you say?

Today I shared a hadith, something about the 4 things that could guarantee Jannah.
1. Good words
2. Spreading the Salam
3. Maintaining good relationships
4. Praying when others sleep. (qiamullail)

So as I ended the sharing session, i began pondering..have i myself achieved in practicing these things that i say? So do i have the right to speak? To preach? Is it true that one must not say what he is incapable of doing? Should we just only speak of deeds that we have done and never advice others of sins that we are still doing? So as I thought about it the whole night, I came across this hadith..

On the authority of Anas RA; He said that they (the companions) once asked Rasulullah SAW:
" Ya Rasulullah, is it true that we should not preach others to do good, until ourselves have done it,
and that we should not prevent them from certain sins, until ourselves have succeeded in preventing all? "
And in answering, he (Rasulullah) said:
" It's not like that. Preach others of deeds, though you haven't done them and prevent others from sins, though you haven't avoided all of them."
( at-Tabrani - assogheer wal awsot )

If any of you have proof that this hadith is dha'if, please state, because i just read it in a book.

At BMI

Alhamdulillah..all was safe..but somethings in the journey went out of hands..
Missed Jalan Duta, got lost in Klang..
Did a few unneeded sightseeing at Pasar Seni..
But Alhamdulillah.I'm now at BMI..

Leaving..

This evening..mom said: 'Did you know, your late uncle and aunties (my uncle 2 years bcoz of bacteria, my auntie died 4 years ago due to an accident, and her sister died a year b4 that bcoz of denggi) never knew that as they stepped out of their house they would never return..'
Well, literally one would never know when one will die, so no one knows whether the journey would be the last or not..
But when my mother said this 2 me, I understood enough..
Tonite, at 10.15 sharp i'll be on the bus. A journey to kl, back to college.
Please pray that all will be safe and sound..
Ya Allah, if I am to die..let it be in iman..

Khamsan Qabla Khamsin

Praying Isya' at the Datuk Keramat Musholla made me realise two things.

1. That the majority of the makmum..and of course plus the imam were elders. I mean really elders. So I started thinking..is the population by age an inverse triangle? I mean, are there more fifty plus2 aged men in this country than twenty plus2? Answer yourself, because the musholla seemed to prove that.

2. That actually being old is not that easy. I mean yeah, i know its hard...with the health problems and everything. But as I prayed ba'adiah, i couldn't help notice the man in front of me lethargically rising for his second rakaat. I apologise if this is considered as an insult, but generally speaking he was old and cranky. And in seeing this, I finally realised what Rasulullah sallallahu alayhi wasallam meant by your youth before your old age in this hadith:

"Ightanim khamsan qabla khamsin: hayaataka qabla mautika, wa sihhataka qabla saqamika, wa faraaghaka qabla shughulika, wa shabaabaka qabla haramika wa ghinaaka qabla faqrika.""Take advantage of five before five: your life before your death, your health before your illness, your free time before becoming busy, your youth before your old age and your wealth before your poverty."

All this while  i didn't realise the fact that if by His means, each and everyone of us will individually grow old. And by that time everything we have now would be gone. Our strength, our spirits, our dreams, our abilities..all gone..engulfed by age. So would we wait. Wait till the age comes, when at that time we are sure of death around the corner. And only then we would struggle to repent, to do 'amal, to seek jannah..and without strength, without dreams, without energy..would it be that easy? Think for yourself while you still can.

So ightanim!!
Ightanim shabaabaka qabla haramik!!

Just redha. Its a process.

Death, pain, despair, failure.

These are a just a few out of many things that shake our lives. That open our eyes. However, failing to understand the hikmah (reasons) for these tests will bring up something much unwanted ie. depress, hopeless and may even end up to suicide.

No i'm not telling you that you MUST understand why each and every thing happens, because it would be impossible to do so...

but what i am telling you that if you could consider these things as tests, not just for you, but for each and everyone in this world, and realise that the One spinning the wheel is Allah...then sometimes you could see that behind dark clouds are actually rain. Beautiful molecules of hydrogen and oxygen, so detailly combined, so complexly oriented, that no one could explain except Him. And only Him. 

155. And certainly, We shall test you with something of fear, hunger, loss of wealth, lives and fruits, but give glad tidings to As-Sabirin (the patient ones, etc.).
156. Who, when afflicted with calamity, say: "Truly! To Allah we belong and truly, to Him we shall return."
157. They are those on whom are the Salawat (i.e. blessings, etc.) (i.e. who are blessed and will be forgiven) from their Lord, and (they are those who) receive His Mercy, and it is they who are the guided-ones.
 (Surah Al-Baqarah 2)

214. Or think you that you will enter Paradise without such (trials) as came to those who passed away before you? They were afflicted with severe poverty and ailments and were so shaken that even the Messenger and those who believed along with him said, "When (will come) the Help of Allah?" Yes! Certainly, the Help of Allah is near!
 (Surah Al-Baqarah 2)

82. Verily, His Command, when He intends a thing, is only that He says to it, "Be!" and it is!
83. So Glorified is He and Exalted above all that they associate with Him, and in Whose Hands is the dominion of all things, and to Him you shall be returned.
 (Surah Yaasin 36)

Simply said, there are some incidents in life that we really can't plan.

No I'm sorry, there are MANY things in life that we can't plan. But by believing that things happen in our way made us become humans that deny the fact of how things should be and should not. And we start blaming condition, blaming ourselves, blaming others. The truth is, even I don't know what i'm babbling about...haha..

The truth is, learn to accept

No not just accept that it HAS HAPPENED..

but to also accept that is HAS TO HAPPEN..

and there you'll find REDHA..and there you'll see that its a process in life

Just 4 men..

Funny Things People do During Khutbah

Jannah

When questioning the cost to buy a ticket to heaven..I was given this answer..

Since when could we pay for Jannah? If the 'ibadah of an 'abid who prays night and day for each second he has in life for 500 years could only weigh one of his eyes, then how much would our 'ibadah cost? 

Obtaining Jannah is about gaining His Blessings. So the value needed to get Jannah?

It is the value that is seen only in His eyes.. but who are we to judge it?

And if it takes every penny we have, then spend it. If it takes every tear we have, then spill it. If it takes every strength we have, then use it. If it takes every second we have, then sacrifice it. Bcoz this life, is the only shot we have in achieving it.

Some words to think about

When once asked by a journalist to introduce himself, he said:


I am a traveller seeking the Truth, a human searching for the meaning of humanity, and a citizen seeking dignity, freedom, stability and welfare under the shade of Islam. I am a free man who is aware of the purpose of his existence and who proclaims;"Truly, my prayer and my sacrifice, my life and my death, are all for Allah, the Cherisher of the worlds; no partner has He. This I am commanded and I am among those who submit to His Will."This is who I am. Who are you?

Hassan Al-Banna

Yeah, I know. I posted this on my wall, yet again I posted it here.
But seriously, who cares? The more I read it, the more I realise my purpose..

Finally..

Alhamdulillah, I'm now finally back in Perlis. Settled down and ready  to begin my story..
This one's gonna be long, so if you have time..Please continue reading.

This story is about what happened in these last thirty days, what I did and where I was. Also the perfect alibi for my long no-posting days..
It all started on the 4th of June. Well it actually began long b4 that, (the planning, organising and paperworks) but mainly it was on the 4th that the program actually started. The program is called TAMU. A short form for Tamrin and Mukhayyam (simply defined as indoor and outdoor). A program done for kids 8-12. This year it was the 7th time done and the theme was Smart Solat, Smart Hayat. Generally pointing out that a person who knows how to practice a perfect prayer will achieve a smart life.
If you wanna know more about this program, you can read here. She's one of the hardworking facilitators at TAMU (sorry, i'll pay for it if you want to..)
I actually don't have much time, and if I shared what I went through in organising this program..it would be a bit emotional and sad, bcoz I slept late every night and bcoz what happened backstage was much much more tiring and mind blowing than seen. So as proof that it was actually fun, I imported it.
But who cares, bcoz the thing is,  I learnt much more things about planning, about knowing, about love. Bcoz when you tell others to do things, you surely will be tested with what you say. So this program not only taught the kids about prayers, it also taught me that khusyu' is a part of yourself that if Allah is not the highest in your heart, as your love, then it is impossible to achieve. And removing other loves; with its beauty, its comfort and its sweetness from this heart other than to Allah, is really hard. Too hard to be put into words. So the solution that I found in the tiredness and exhaustion from the program was, if we love Allah deeply enough, He will aid us in dispatching this hubbudunia away. InsyaAllah.

So after packing things up, on the evening of the 7th of June, the exact date TAMU ended, me and my brothers took off to KL. They were on practical. We arrived there 2am on the 8th. Then I took a coach to Shah Alam to join a Mukhayyam MISI (Mukhayyam Siswa Siswi). Now b4 I talk about this mukhayyam, I just wanna remind fellow readers that a commuter going to Shah Alam at 6.50pm, would be like a tin of sardines. Alhamdulillah, introducing a specific coach only for women helped a lot.

The Mukhayyam was fun and I got a lot of input from it, because sometimes when you are with other brothers, things come in a different way. I learnt how to cook chicken soup, pekasam and some veggie soup. But I think I can only remember the chicken soup, because after that I did a lot more watching and tasting than actually participating..ha2.

Then on the morning of the 11th, I took a coach back to KL, got busy helping my aunt prepare for her Thanksgiving Gathering (Kenduri Kesyukuran..ha2) the next day. It was all a family work. We did everything on our own. So on the day itself, I was a waiter, in charge of refilling the rice. I met an American man. Muslim. We had a long chat about the difference between the productivity of electrical engineering research in Malaysia and America. He made me realise that whoever controls the world has control over the highest technology, because their researches are military based, and the funding is limitless. So if i'm really interested to go into research, I should work at  US, which is impossible..ha2.

Exactly at 6.35pm, my brother sent me to the (IIM) Institut Integriti Malaysia's office at Jalan Duta. I slept at 3.30am, to help with the last touches and preparation for the CSR Rebung program. Then the next day (13th) at 10am, we went to MRSM Felda Trolak, by IIM bus. To make things short, what I saw, experienced and learnt was that integrity is actually unneeded. Bcoz if you practise Islam perfectly, you can see that Ihsan, That you worship Allah as if you see Him, for if you don't see Him then truly He sees you

teaches us exactly about integrity. I also realised there that one can work for days and night without rest, exhaust himself, and do everything for the sake of making something happen. And in the end, he would actually obtain nothing except satisfactory. Which will give? Nothing. But if ones exhaustion and work is lined out on the road of Lillahita'ala, whether he achieves in making that certain thing happen or not doesn't matter, bcoz what Allah sees is his work, not his result. Subhanallah..
On the 19th, I came back to KL. The 20th went to an important launching. 21st took a bus back to Perlis. And now I'm here.
Conclusion: I just hope, really hope and pray that every drop of energy I used was for Him. And only for Him.

PS: I was a camp commander for TAMU, participant for MISI, and sekretariat for CSR.
PPS: Told you it was gonna be long.

Some Last Words to think about

This is the Last Speech made by the Beloved Rasulullah PBUH, Ninth Day of Zulhijjah 10 AH at the Uranah Valley of Mount Arafah;
After praising & thanking GOD he said:
 
"O People, lend me an attentive ear, for I know not whether, after this year, I shall ever be amongst you again. Therefor listen to what I am saying to you very carefully & TAKE THESE WORDS TO THOSE WHO COULD NOT BE PRESENT HERE TODAY.
O people, just as you regard this month, this city as sacred, so regard the life & property of every Muslim as a sacred trust. Return the goods entrusted to you to their rightful owners. Hurt no one so that no one may hurt you. Remember that you will indeed meet your LORD, and that HE will indeed reckon your deeds. ALLAH has forbidden you to take usury(Interest), therefor all Interest obligation shall henceforth be waived. Your capital, however, is yours to keep. You will neither inflict nor suffer inequity.
 
Beware of Satan, for the safety of your religion. He has lost all hope that he will ever be able to lead you astray in big things, so beware of following him in small things.
 
O people it is true that you have certain rights with regard to your women, but they also have rights over you. Remember that you have taken them as your wives only under ALLAH's trust & with His permission. If they abide by your right then to them belongs the right to be fed & clothed in kindness. Do treat your women well & be kind to them for they are your partners & committed helpers. And it is your right that they do not make friendship with any one of whom you do not approve, as well as never to be unchaste.
 
O people, listen to me earnest, worship your LORD, say your five daily prayers, fast during the month of Ramadan, & give your wealth to Zakat(Charity). Perform Hajj if you can afford to.
All mankind are from Adam & Eve, an Arab has no Superiority over a non-Arab nor a non-Arab has superiority over an Arab;ALSO a white has no superiority over a black nor a black has any superiority over white except by piety & good action. Learn that every Muslim is a brother to another Muslim & that the Muslims constitute one brotherhood.Nothing shall be legitimate to a Muslim which belongs to a fellow muslim unless it was given freely & willingly. Do not therefor, do unjustice to yourselves.
 
Remember, one day you will appear before the GOD & answer for your deeds. So beware, do not stray from the path of righteousness after I am gone.
 
O people, NO PROPHET OR APOSTLE WILL COME AFTER ME & NO FAITH WILL BE BORN. Reason well, therefor, O people, understand words which I convey to you. I leave behind me two things, The QURAN & my examples the Sunnah & if you follow these you will never go astray."

Take time to understand, read again if you must, bcoz everytime I read it, it would touch my heart.

I'm Sorry..

Sincerely..I'm regretting about many things tonight..knowing I should apologise to many..for every unpredictables that i've done.
Mainly to Allah, for my sins..

“And those who, having done something to be ashamed of, or wronged their own souls, earnestly bring Allah to mind, and ask for forgiveness for their sins,- and who can forgive sins except Allah.- and are never obstinate in persisting knowingly in (the wrong) they have done."

Al-Imran 135

P/S: I'm also sorry for this long break, these last days have been very packed..REALLY packed.

Just strive for it..

I was actually planning to comment this one on someones post..but it seems appropriate to be shared coz I know..even I go through hardships in life.

 Those who will strive in Our cause, We shall guide them to Our own paths, and surely Allah is with the righteous.

Al-Ankabuut 29:69

There, it is said that a person who exerts will exert for his own good. Here it is being reassured that Allah does not leave alone those who strive in His cause sincerely, even at the risk of a conflict with the entire world, but He helps and guides them and opens for them ways towards Himself. He teaches them at every step the way of winning His approval and good-will and He shows them the light at every turning point to discriminate between the Right Way and the wrong ways of life. In short, Allah helps and succors and guides them according to their sincerity and intensity of desire for goodness.